\"Oh hello, are you the new coach here at Notre Dame?\"
\"Yes, I am.\"
\"And what's your name again?\"
\"My name is --\"
\"IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!!! You will go 31-30 over your five years at this university, claiming your greatest win in a bowl game against Hawai'i! You will continue to recruit high-caliber national talent and not do a damn thing with it! You WILL continue to play a national schedule every year and get your brains beaten in by the likes of Michigan, Michigan State and USC. You come in here with your coaching credentials and your championship rings and you think you can take over Touchdown Jesus? Well Touchdown Jesus says this: you need to walk yourself right over to the corner of Jabroni Drive and Five-Years-Tops Boulevard, take that golden dome, put a coat of fresh spray-paint on it, turn that sumbish sideways, and shove it straight up your candy @$$, if you smell what Touchdown Jesus is cookin!\"
Red and Black, Win or Lose
